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It’s time to take care of you!
Hey there, fabulous midlifers! How often do you think about self care? I get it – life in your 50s and beyond can be a whirlwind. There are lots of responsibilities, juggling a career, family, and everything in between. But let’s not forget the most crucial person in this equation: YOU!
No, we’re not talking about elaborate spa days or extravagant vacations (although those are fantastic!). We’re all about the little, everyday practices that can make a big difference in your well-being.
So, whether it’s finding zen in a cup of tea, stealing a few quiet moments with a good book, or just reminding yourself that it’s okay to take a breather… Self-care is your secret weapon to thriving in this fabulous midlife journey. Let’s explore it together!
I know the words “self care’ can be a little trendy. But there is truth in them…(I know you’ve heard it before!) if you don’t take care of yourself then you can’t show up as the woman that you want to be.
My Turning Point
A few years ago I had a friend who was encouraging a group of women from my church to sign up for a sprint triathlon. Now…you have to understand that I am not a swimmer, or a biker, or a runner! But…there was something that kept drawing me back to this idea. “Do it Scared,” kept repeating in my mind. I was scared…but I signed up…not really knowing if I was physically capable of even finishing it!
4 months were spent training…and hoping that I had done enough! I showed up the morning of the event with my family. I had one goal….finish the race.
The 12 mile bike portion of the race was lonely…I felt like I was the only one still out there. I was feeling pretty discouraged and even thought about only doing 2 laps instead of 3!
But I finished the race…I was slow…but I did it. My 3 daughters joined me as I crossed the finish line…I was holding back some tears! It felt great. I was proud of myself for doing something hard. Showing my daughters that they could pursue activities that fulfilled them as a wife and mother felt great!
There was something about taking the time to train for that race…and doing something challenging just for me… that was exhilarating! I realized that I needed to take better care of myself so that I could show up better for those that I love!
Be Healthy…for You
That race was a turning point for me. I realized that I had not been taking care of me and it was having a negative impact on my children and my marriage. I won’t say that I have been perfect at finding time for self care since that race…but I have been working on taking time out for me!
When I say it’s time to take care of you. I’m not talking about neglecting the things that need to be done…but it’s time to stop playing the martyr! (I’m talking to myself here…because I’ve done that!)
I believe there is a time in a woman’s life when she voluntarily sacrifices her time and energy to take care of young children. I think the problem that some women have (I’m talking to myself here) is that we continue to hide behind the title of “busy mother.” We avoid developing our talents and doing things that bring us and those around us joy.
What Is Self Care for Midlife Women?
For a long time, I thought self care had to be a big, expensive, time-consuming event. I pictured spa days, girls’ weekends, and retreats that required lots of planning (and money). And while those things are lovely, they always felt just out of reach for my everyday life. Who has time to schedule a getaway between work, parenting, housework, and all the other responsibilities midlife brings?
But over time, I’ve learned something important: self care isn’t about big moments—it’s about small, sustainable habits that fill your cup. It’s the little things you do to care for your body, mind, and soul. It’s showing up for yourself in the middle of your real life, not waiting for the perfect moment.
What Does Real Self Care Look Like?
It might be a 15-minute walk in the morning.
Reading a chapter in a book before bed.
Drinking a warm cup of tea in peace.
Even treating yourself to grocery store sushi on a Tuesday afternoon (yes, I’ve done that and highly recommend it!).
These small, consistent acts of care are the ones that truly matter—because they’re realistic and repeatable. They remind you that your needs matter, even in the middle of laundry piles and carpools.
Let’s Get Practical
Take a moment (seriously—grab a piece of paper) and write down the things that energize you or make you feel happy. Make sure some of them are simple and free. Then ask yourself: How often am I doing these things?
If the answer is “not very often,” that’s okay. This is your chance to gently shift that.
Start small. Pick one thing from your list and add it to your day or week. When self care feels manageable, it becomes something you actually do, not just something you wish you had time for.
Why Self Care Matters in Midlife
Midlife brings a whole new set of physical, emotional, and mental challenges—and self care is one of the most powerful tools we have for meeting them with strength and grace. Here’s why it’s so important:
1. Physical Well-Being
Taking care of your body helps you feel energized and capable. Prioritizing rest, eating well, staying hydrated, and moving your body all support your immune system, reduce the risk of chronic illness, and help you feel your best.
2. Emotional Health
Let’s be real: midlife is full of transition. Empty nesting, caring for aging parents, changing relationships, and shifting roles can all feel heavy. Self care helps manage stress, boosts emotional resilience, and gives you a safe space to process and recharge.
3. Mental Clarity
From brain fog to decision fatigue, midlife can be mentally draining. Practices like mindfulness, journaling, or even taking a quiet moment alone can help clear your head and improve focus.
4. Hormonal Balance
Hormones during perimenopause and menopause can wreak havoc on your mood, sleep, and energy levels. Gentle self care practices—like consistent rest, stress reduction, and balanced nutrition—can help ease those ups and downs.
5. Healthier Relationships
When you’re running on empty, it’s hard to be present for others. Taking care of yourself first means you can show up more fully for the people you love. It reduces burnout and helps you enjoy your relationships instead of just managing them.
6. Stronger Sense of Identity
Midlife is often a season of rediscovery. As you shift out of certain roles—like full-time parenting or career-building—it’s normal to ask, Who am I now? Self care gives you space to explore that question and reconnect with the things that light you up.
7. More Productivity
Believe it or not, taking breaks actually makes you more effective. Self care helps you reset, refocus, and return to your tasks with more clarity and energy.
8. Burnout Prevention
Between work, family, and everything in between, it’s easy to hit a wall. Small daily moments of rest and replenishment can keep you from reaching full-on burnout mode.
9. Positive Role Modeling
Your self care doesn’t just benefit you—it sets an example for others, especially your children or those around you. You show them that it’s okay—and important—to take care of yourself.
10. Better Quality of Life
At the end of the day, self care adds up to a richer, healthier, more fulfilling life. You deserve that. You don’t have to wait for retirement or an empty calendar. You can start now.
So go ahead—take that walk, drink your tea slowly, and savor the quiet. Your well-being matters. And midlife is the perfect time to start caring for yourself like someone worth prioritizing… because you are.
What does self care look like for me?
- Planning. When I have a plan for all the things I need to do as a mom…I’m also able to plan when I’m going to have time to do those things that energize and refresh me. Here is my post on how I set 10, 5, and 1 year goals and plans.
- Midlife Mission Statement. When I’m reading my mission statement everyday it is so much easier for me to say no to those things I know won’t help me to be happy and to focus on those activities that are aligned with my priorities.
- Staying Healthy. When I feel better…I do better. For me that means getting some exercise, drinking my water, eating enough fruits & veggies and getting enough sleep!
- Connection. I need to spend some time building relationships with my kids and my husband…I feel off when my relationships aren’t stable (yes…even my teenagers who are often not so easy to connect with!)
Make it Happen!
- Did you make that list of things that energize you? Do it! Make sure you have some simple things that you can do during your busy days.
- Post that list where you can see it…inside your closet, in your planner, or on your wall by your bed. Put it someplace you will see these self care activities.
- Sign up for my “Use-It” Letter…get ideas each week that are meant to help make your life easier and more fulfilling as a midlife woman!